C•ko•fn•ta•C

hey i loved this. great job. you've got some serious chops and if i wanna make another VN, i feel like theres a lot that i might model off of this (your UI was really cool and understandable to me, the mix of NVL, ADV, and bubbles was really engaging, the warpy animations, among other things).

your color theory and sprites were great, your skill as an artist really shines - i liked the sounds, especially the background hum and buzz. really good ambiance.

I admire your ability to structure the narrative. Great framing quotes, It was really neatly told, and tightly paced. There's a lot of interlocking pieces between Sunny & Anita: fandom crusader vs. total conflict aversion, self-ignorance vs. self-flagellation, groomer vs. groomee. You really set up a miserable little machine between these two.

on some level i think everyone exists on a spectrum of how Sunny are they on a given day, in a given interaction. a cop gets inserted into every head and if its not policing someone else, its gonna police yourself. the rare glimpses of Sunny questioning herself or having any lucidity were pretty critical otherwise i think she'd be raw cartoonish villain. anyway, had me thinking a lot about times i had been vile to people purely to insist "my" own values on them, and likewise when people had done this to me. certainly in fandom, but definitely not limited to fandom. its everywhere. 

speaking of: the horsehair worm infection & the death of the internal dialog - this was one of the most compelling parts of the story to me and so i was just mulling it over constantly. as a viewer, i walked away wishing that you had done more here, pushed the idea farther, and that disappointment is probably a good thing. anita losing herself in work, and her intuition paying the price is just really riveting.

still thinking about the decision to kill sunny off, and the jaded late-20s twitter thread epilogue. in some ways it feels kind of like a victory lap for Sunny, and is that supposed to be for the reader too? the job at walmart makes sense; the grappling with the optics of having been abused by someone lower down the ladder is cool, but lightly touched on - there's more here to think about? where are the other Sunny's of the world, and how have they impacted Anita - are there rumors accusing Anita being a murderer? is her life being litigated in the public sphere? there's a dead girl - how does the local law feel about it? is there a power fantasy or a sense of justice we're supposed to feel here? i'm not sure how i feel about this way of wrapping things up - i kind of wish that this had been a moment to zoom out rather than zoom in.

anyway, great game, lots to think about, thanks for making it!

tw for brief suicidal thoughts mention

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wonderful, poignant and terrifying piece on modern moral surveillance culture. i run the risk of retreading what's already been well-articulated in previous comments but this is a truly gut-wrenching (literally) read! i was fully recoiling away from the screen at certain points. also i do appreciate that anita's buns and side pieces make her look like a mantis (horsehair worm host) and sunny's hair bows look like fly wings :). 

at the risk of doxxing myself, i've previously lived waterville maine so the setting was a huge jumpscare and a half. you had me looking around checking for cameras in my house. at low points i've weighed the merits of drowning myself in the pond. side-eyeing that disclaimer that all events are purely fictional.... where's my royalty check

thank you for making this game. it makes me feel relieved to see this issue talked about so frankly. i spent so much of my teens online scared out of my mind that i would lose friends due to being "wrong" about whatever discourse was happening, only to realize later in my life that none of it ever mattered at all.

it's gut crushing to see the way sunny's thought process justifies all of her own actions. the mental leaps she takes and then forces onto anita, who accepts them because she's scared of hurting people. sunny's insistence that making art about abuse means anita will hurt people is so sickening. also sidenote every twitter/tumblr post you wrote was so accurate to the fake cute condescending ass tone of those posts it was almost hard to read.

i think this is a really important game in the context of this jam especially. as a group we're fighting back against that poisonous instinct to censor art for the sake of hypothetical people's comfort. we're making things for ourselves, and the others out there who need to hear what we have to say. and we're not gonna stop.

kind of a modern day Misery. the art / audio was superb, and though im not in fandom space as much anymore, this brought back plenty of memories from my time on spaces like tumblr in the 2010's. really creative gui / chapter transitions, subversive in ways i didnt expect. very nice work, ty for creating <3

oh so everyone wants to be kissed and taken care of by a cute pointy toothed girl with one missing but if yucky brushing her makes her uncomfy thats a deal breaker? i understand that by portraying a character like sunny in your work youre giving full endorsement of her behavior and actions to which i can say nothing other than I AGREEE !!! shes literally such a good person a real open book just like she says and that book contains absolutely nothing rated pg 13 or higher !! anita was so lucky to have a gal like her who truly understood her never looking past her never talking past her and willing to fix her into a moral paragon who consumes and excretes only the correct kind of art !!

god sunnys character in this really is just the fucking greatest though an aptly named exterior gives way to what can only be described as the most insanely frustrating woman on the planet and the sickening abuse she does to anita as ;; doing the right thing ;; is so real. when she was like daww look at you youre so gay i physically recoiled in my chair like i have GOT to drown myself !! speaking of the little twist on the final stage of the horsehair worms life cycle was awesome although the mantis survived the drowning and the other died instead the parasite postmortem still haunted its host. also you really nailed the visual (and audio !!) part of the visual novel impressive how more storytelling is done through that than narration. i love how much is conveyed through the instants between microexpressions and the ui and framing devices used for anita are sooo clever. thank you for the toxic bug yuri about wholesome bug yuri certainly a fitting tyvnj2 submission 

I don't think I'll ever have a moment of gaming euphoria as strong as when I pulled up No Children by the mountain goats during that lake scene and perfectly timed it. Perhaps the greatest pop-off I've had while playing a game. Not even beating Sans compares. What an awesome, awesome VN.

Honestly unbelievable that this game was made in only six weeks. All of the art, audio (the foley work???) and writing are top-notch. Separating its chapters into "stages," with the accompanying visuals and relevant literary quotes, just showcases how tightly-made the whole package is.

And then there's the story itself, which is maybe the most deeply relevant thing I've ever read. As someone who had a callout post made about her on 2010s tumblr, this captures the moralizing language of that crowd to a T. It was legitimately cathartic. Thank you for writing this.

Deeply topical! Required reading for everybody! Though I suppose with the context of Mr Ellison this kind of thing has always been topical/required reading, haha. Also loved the quotes! Was happy to see some familiar names!

I just finished so I'm kind of still digesting, but wowee! Pleasantly surprised at Anita's conversational interiority that was more examining and metacognative vs Sunny's immediate and confident thought terminations which felt like a subtle distinction in the prose despite the whole thing being kind of built around it. Also on subtlety, the design choices to evoke their respective bugs! Noticing Anita's glasses and 'antennae' ahoge against the first cg where you see Sunny's long braid, I was like oh!! A small delight in an otherwise desolating experience!

Thank you! I'm going to feel ill for the next week!

This was so compelling and well done! The sound design kept making me want to gag too (said positively lol). Every detail was so haunting- I was so tense playing this and was riveted!! I especially really loved the scenes when Anita is talking to her inner self. I thought the UI changes were so clever like with the two of them looking at Sunny through a computer screen, giving this detached, out of body experience, or the contrast of that black space compared to the ornate UI in Sunny's house. When the other Anita is begging to be saved and saying "Get her out", it was told so well. I was so tense and had my hand clapped over my mouth as if my uneasiness and disgust was trying to get out of me too.  And then the scene afterward where Anita is comforting her, and you just see the little faint texts appearing as she hugs her... The framing/UI of this game is just done so well and packs such a punch. I loved the art and expressionwork in this game too. When Sunny's expression would rapidly change before putting up a mask--- sometimes I had to scroll back through the dialogue to replay it because it leaves you with this feeling of "wait, did I actually just see that, or was I imagining it?" It was such an immersive feeling.

The subject matter too is something I have thought a lot about, as someone who is frustrated with fandom purity culture and the echo chamber it becomes, but have never been able to express it fully. I don't know how to fully express my feelings on this game either. Just that I think you put voice to a lot of the things and feelings I have and I really appreciated you making this game. I almost feel like I read an academic paper on fandom culture because this was just so cleverly done and felt so intelligent. Lately I've been wanting to return to writing again and haven't quite felt that old spark looking at my old abandoned projects. When Anita boiled down Sunny's work to fluff and therapyspeak, I realized that my older projects were more along those lines and I wasn't interested in telling those stories because that is not the story I need anymore. Thanks for the nudge and thanks for your words!

i was absolutely blown away by the presentation of this vn: the UI, little movements/pauses, sound design... loved it all!!! 

the story also resonated with me so deeply ...... as someone who has witnessed all the discourse mentioned in this game happen in real-time, it felt so unsettling to watch more of those arguments be relayed in this game.

i empathized with anita so much (as someone who is also struggling with delving into more taboo themes after staying pg-13 for so long), and watching sunny twist her coping mechanisms into something to be ashamed of/requiring censorship hurt me so much.... especially after she actually carries out the heinous acts she so vocally disapproves of when it comes to anita's work. also ESPECIALLY as someone who deals with hella ocd when it comes to these topics, sunny was basically just all my intrusive thoughts when it comes to making works like these. god i hate her /pos

overall fantastic game!! can't stop thinking about it after i played (it's been a couple days and i'm still thinking about it.....) and everyone who has experienced 2010s tumblr needs to hop on.

To begin with, just outstanding, breathtaking presentation. Fell in love with the UI and the artwork and the soundscaping from the moment the game launched. And it only won me over more from there.

Now, for the meat of it. It’s difficult for me to size up my feelings towards the themes that this work touches, always having been a somewhat quiet voice in online discourse, mostly keeping to myself and my circles. I’ve been in fandom for a long, long while, and I was able to recognize patterns of behaviour the VN has tried to encapsulate, but mostly from the perspective of an outsider. As someone who has friends of friends who were affected by it, rather than having felt it personally. And even then, it is so palpable how real and raw these things are for you to have captured them so vividly.

I can see in C•ko•fn•ta•C so many waking nightmares I’ve seen play out as I scroll the feeds, so many second-hand accounts I’ve had related to me. It feels as if I’m listening to a replay of those stories in a different voice and in different words, if that makes sense.

And as an artist, especially one that is only now just dipping her toes into more… unpalatable stuff, and trying to keep her head held high throughout it all… I can’t help but empathize with Anita. Even though we may not see eye to eye on certain issues, I can’t help but feel utterly revolted when the fundamental want for understanding gets ignored, negated, and inverted, used as a weapon.

All that to say that, even though we may not agree on everything, I’m so so grateful that you shared this. It’s a new way of exploring issues that have been with us for decades, but from a new perspective. Although it may retread old ground, it is yet idiosyncratic and personal and raw and yours, and it should be allowed to exist and thrive. As always, excited for more.

And of course Sunny is just so amazingly terrible in such fascinating ways. “I’m going to hell” YEAH I KNOW GIRLIE LOL

Extremely important work, while being a captivating, revolting thriller cover to cover. I’d rate it 5/5 three times over if I could.

im now thinking if paptimus scirocco would be a tenderqueer. sunny is so good at being disgusting and revolting in every way

edit: to sunny, she kinda what is so disgusting about 'cozy and wholesome only yuri', 'ethical romantasy', and earlier than those discourses 'cozy horror', a person who believes in an acceptable set of story elements from which there is no true harm (her kissing rule among them) and that the world should exist for her comfort and affirmation of her self-importance as a 'fan (consumer)' (e.g. pushing for big breasted drawings and the parasocial sexual harassment of this demand). her kissing rule is really egregious, being one of those mild romantic drama devices which is only not 'noncon' [genre] (and thus yucky) by the mainstreaming of certain het-palatable mild BDSM dynamics, but is most certainly noncon. even worse, it is part of the meaningful steps building up to her actual sexual assault.

so i was kind of saving this for a day when i felt gross about what i had made, what i wanted to keep making. having thoughts like "won't this harm other survivors?" "what will people think of me when they see this?" "what if i'm not 'allowed' to write about this?" "what if people decide my coping mechanisms are EVIL?". well today was that day.

up front i think this is a damned fine work. the sfx (both UI and in-game) work pulled me in immediately, the full-screen animations/interstitials looked killer and i think you leveraged them to manage the pace of things well (i wailed when i saw that stage IV was not "adulthood"/"maturity"), and the character art... i am not going to be able to get Sunny's kissy face or creeper face out of my head for a long damn while.

and the story... i'm looking back over my notes and there is a steady deterioration from "observations about technique or salient moments" to "yelling to concur or object" to "screaming at Sunny to go fuck herself, a lot" to "incoherence". so yeah. the proverbial slow-motion trainwreck.

what resonated with me though is (no surprise) the theming. like yes i largely avoided tumblr and was not really a creative up until very recently (and certainly not one of any notoriety), but as a twitter oldhead it was unavoidable, both seeing artists get exploded over being a little "spicy" and watching that behavior percolate down into interactions between fans who would hardly know or effect one another if not for yelling at one another about being problematic. it was tough not to both fear and internalize all that as Anita and Sunny had. to replicate it.

i felt you really explored the power of language and like, expression versus action. how Sunny frames her obviously manipulative and abusive behavior in medicalizing language in order to justify it to herself was just like, ugh. damn. right on the money. how she uses the language of social justice to shut down and box in Anita's expression of tastes, ideas, needs. how she infantilizes Anita and traps her in a daughterwife situation to establish a punishment-reward system, to create dependency (and fear of loss of support), to frame herself as pure and Anita as corrupt even though... just like. any action no matter how awful is fine to Sunny (awesome choice of name btw lol) so long as she can clothe it in a warped rhetoric that frames it as "good, actually". god damn. you nailed it. like you said in the afterword, i got no idea if this will change anything, but it does give people a language with which to recognize and reject abuse cloaked as purity and other such misused ideas.

also some of the particularities of Anita's imprisonment, well, sniped me from 800 yards away. god. the kissing rule. her breath. revolting. (lmao i'm going through the comments and of course this got everyone. as gross as it was, it was really the infantilization that horrified me. you really nailed what is so terrifying about being someone's uwu precious smol bean in need of a little fixing and healing come on i'll just put you in this little cup don't you like the holes i poked in it for you here eat my favorite leaves we'll be together forever :) :) :) )

also, fucking, god. i'm sorry you were able to depict so well such an utterly terrifying obsessive manipulative abusive fan/collaborator. god damn. god damn.

thank you for making this. i really did need to read this today.

wow, it only really hit me in retrospect how well you convey sunny's subtle manipulation of anita, how she worms a conversation to get thanked for solving the problems she causes. anita just kinda lets all her edge and idiosyncrasy get castrated to become a hollow imitation of her own past. reminded me a lot of the movie Adaption for some reason where the movie is about a self-abusive dialogue about making the movie one is actively making. i don't have the experience of being in a fandom or being groomed, so sorry that's my only point of reference. also shoutout harlan ellison!

Wow ! I had seen a bunch of people say this was specific and wow     ! This is specific! In a way that really gets under your skin. I played it last night and recapped it to my girlfriend and we both just sort of sat there like… ow… (hurting in a good way) I’ve seen a lot of Sunnys, including a few close personal encounters, and seen a lot of Sunny & Anitas. And taking 2 seconds to glance at the comments tells me that’s not a rare experience!

First of all, I really appreciate this work as a way to viscerally concretize and exemplify this common and isolating behavior. I really do hope people play through this and feel less alone, and then see the loads of comments and feel somewhat cared for. 

(Spoilers here on out)

But also, what exacting execution. Sunny’s characterization especially was so horrifyingly precise. I was obsessed with the detail of her not brushing her teeth because mint “gives [her] the ick”—it’s an absurd detail that made me laugh out loud because it was a PERFECTLY fitting bit of satire. The little punctuations of comedy were to perfect in how they broke up the horrifying procession of the plot but in a way that still informed the characterization etc.(I also screamed when Anita just says “It’s been seven years” at Sunny talking about Byleth’s outfit).

With this in mind, I agree with Alter that the vn could’ve used a little more breathing room and a little more of Anita’s POV—the latter especially, because you knocked Sunny’s characterization so out of the park that Anita’s wonderful characterization still felt like it fell a smidge short by comparison. But this almost feels ridiculous to bring up because 1) it’s a genuinely amazing work 2) it is so impressive you got this done in a 6 week jam timeline as a solo work and had time to send for beta testing… like HELLO… Mado the superstar.

But the best part of Anita’s characterization for me, and the part of the vn that will probably stick with me the longest, is how she still undercuts herself in the thread on her priv at the end. I am sort of tearing up even just writing about it lol. How she is still unable to fully see the power Sunny had over her and how Sunny exploited Anita’s vulnerabilities, and how paper thin so many of Anita’s supposed “privileges” over Sunny are/were. That was very real and made for such a powerful ending. 

Thanks for making and sharing such a wonderful vn Mado!!

(spoilers ahead)

i had some expectations knowing this was 'misery, but with a fandom artist', but you knocked it out of the park with how in depth it went, holy shit. i know that this is talking about issues seemingly ongoing (and perhaps inherent) to fandom, but it really felt like i was transported back to 2015-era tumblr with the discourse. thank you for giving me bad flashbacks. 

i related quite a bit to anita's general malaise towards all-ages media and their fandoms. sunny herself reminded me a lot of the kinds of people i used to hang around in queer fandom spaces, where there was always a strange air of discomfort around them despite how seemingly wholesome they were. the additional victim-blamey 'well, it's what she would've wanted, knowing her' after the assault was also just. eughghghgh.

also, i remember seeing sunny's sharp teeth in progress screenshots on the tyvn jam fluxer and thinking it was cute at the time, but i was unaware there was a reason for that. i actually winced every time she kissed anita, so good job on that lol.

One of my favorite entries so far. Definitely made me think a lot about the world around me and how I engage with it.

It might seem juvenile in comparison but reading Annie's experiences navigating the arbitrary window of socially "acceptable" artistic expression Sunny set up, I was reminded of the process of migrating to the US and applying for a green card that I went through last year. Then, I was legally advised to scrub my socials completely clean of things that could potentially set off someone from border security or the Department of Homeland Security.

I had to softblock a friend that happened to be a hacktivist, delete pro-Palestine posts off Bsky and Insta, and delete any allusions of me being transgender - never entirely knowing what was "acceptable" and what wasn't. It's easy to see how online fandom policing and migration regimes on a macro-level really are just two sides of the same authoritarian coin, especially so in an internet with eroding anonymity ran by Thiel, Musk, and Zuckerberg.

Of course, I was aware of this on some level but as someone who has only ever been on the peripheries of fandom this VN did a really good job emphasizing that.

Another thing I thought about while playing is that while I was never someone to police others in fandom spaces like this, I've definitely impulsively cut off friends out of nowhere for giving me the "ick" in even a more benign way or out of fear that their preferences would reflect negatively on me. So while the terror that Annie experiences isn't relatable to me per se, I did feel guilt for cutting off people in my life out of the blue. 

Some other things I enjoyed about the VN were its art style and curation of sound effects. I do think it felt a little contrived that Annie wouldn't just return to her house in walking distance. Also, Sunny having bad breath/not brushing her teeth might've detracted a bit from her scariness tbh - I think she would've been even more terrifying if she was completely presentable to her workplace and just acted insane at home/online.

No notes otherwise, this was great.

Arresting, original, suffocating, cathartic. Would recommend!

i feel like there's SO many good things about this i could talk about but ill talk about the two that stick out the most in my mind--first of all, the way the story is told by mostly dialogue without narration was stellar. both of these characters voices were super clear and i feel like there are so many times where just the slightest most specific choice of words said so much more about them than any kind of narration could have and i GENUINELY think anyone who wants to get better at that should read this work. the second thing is i found anita's dialogue with this version of herself she sees in her mind so relatable. i have never seen an internal monologue like mine in fiction ANYWHERE before, nor had i even really thought about trying to approach that (both because my thoughts are so chaotic and conversational and also because really when it comes to writing i consider myself a novice) so the fact that this game portrays it so succinctly truly blew me away. just honestly incredible. oh oh okay and a third thing even tho i said i'd only do two, the choice of quotes were awesome, i genuinely think i am going to go through and read the sources of absolutely every one. fuuuuuuuuuucking fantastic, stellar work!!!

this genuinely felt like I was being haunted by the fandoms of internet past, oh my god.

First I wanna say the presentation of this work was fantastic! The characters were so expressive, and there was some really ingenious usage of GUI tricks throughout that had me gasping out loud. The SFX were very punchy and crisp as well, which was fun during some scenes and GENUINELY VILE in others. 

This game left me feeling gross, and slimy, and uncomfortable even from the very beginning, and that feeling continued to pervade throughout the whole game. I know Sunnys. I know Anitas. I've been both at many different points in my life, and knowing just how raw and realistic many of the discourse points were left me squirming in my seat. 

By the time I finished this game I felt like I had been coated in a film of grime and viscera, uncomfortable but impressed by the sheer disgust I felt. Genuinely an entry that's going to haunt me for a while.

I'm throwing this on alt cuz I just can't bring myself to put this on my main itch, but this one really fucked with me (in a good way). The UI and sound design was great. The story was great. The art was great. First look into this year's TYVN2 entries and wow, what a start. Disgusting and gross and uncomfortable and weird in all the best ways.

Anyways, sorta spoilers below:

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Never been through anything this extreme but I've been pretty adjacent in terms of experiences, in fandom spaces especially.

And the last few years have been really questioning whether or not what I've been through was normal. The more friends I make the more I start to question all my previous friendships, and if they were "toxic".

I think seeing something like that, the exact language being used, put in a game to play? Just like, seeing that type of social panopticon abuse shit (including in my current main fan/online space), and seeing how it mirrored my own experiences with someone(s) I'm friends with... and just like, seeing it from an outsider's perspective and seeing all my intrusive thoughts spelled out like that. That hit really hard. (Also the tumblr esque discourse sections were so fucking funny like omg the TRENCHESSSS...)

Anyways, I've been seriously questioning whether or not what I went through could qualify as "abuse", and I still can't bring myself to call it that. But it was just so familiar. I feel like if I tell people what this person did to me, it really won't matter. Cuz of similar reasons to Anita, and the type of art I like, it wouldn't matter that I was abused and manipulated and am scared of being doxxed. I really relate to her as an online figure even if I don't have a fraction of the audience she does.

I'm someone who uses a lot of fucked up art and writing in private to process and cope with the bullshit abuse I got put through and has a lot of shame for it, and really wishes I could just stop. I don't know right from wrong these days cuz of OCD and anxiety so it feels like I never have the answer to what I think is "okay" or not. I keep my online presence as clean as possible while still engaging in more accepting spaces + retracting from people like Sunny to maintain some peace of mind, esp as a "fandom artist" (even tho that's not even most of what I do or care about these days lol)

Anyways... I feel a little less alone. Sorry for venting in itch.io comment section in public LOOOOL. Not any more brave or safe, but a little less alone. This was too fucking real. Played this with a friend and our reactions ranged from "YOOOO" to "oh...." whole time.

10/10 I don't think I could play this ever again (positive)

The whole thing felt so anxious. If painful or uncomfortable things are never even approached or discussed, people can't learn how to deal with or think about those topics in a healthy way. (As a similar example, abstinence-only sex ed actually leads to higher pregnancy rates than more comprehensive sex ed, despite sex often being seen as a taboo. Source: doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0024658.) Sometimes it's good to be uncomfortable. My friend has a quote they often say that some art is made to "comfort the disturbed, and disturb the comforted," and that's something I find myself agreeing with more and more lately. Excellent writing!

This was genuinely TERRIFYING.

While I haven't experienced all the horrors Anita has, having your morals judged based on the content you create and/or like (especially if it's not "pure" enough or deals with uncomfortable stuff) while the judger/judgers themselves is/are being as toxic as a hazmet barrel... it's all painfully relatable.

Art isn't always supposed to make you comfortable. Sometimes, art is disturbing and makes you ask yourself questions. And making stories/art with content that's uncomfortable or toxic also doesn't mean the author condones the behavior.

This is an amazing game, Mado. Beautiful sprites and CGs, very immersive sound design and a genuinely disturbing story. I think I'm going to be thinking about it a lot.

Wow this hit close to home! the abuse depicted here is so incredibly specific and new, I haven't seen it tackled like this before, but it's something I feel like I've seen a million times in reality. Sunny is so real amd scary and I have met her many times.

I really felt for Anita. When you're trying to make a living as an artist online, you have to put yourself out there and grind so much, but you aren't a 'celebrity'. You don't have any of the money, security, and protection that comes with real fame but you still have the parasocial connections, and expectations put upon you. There's an "idea" of you and your art that people have and if you stray from their perception of you to try and express your real self and your vision, it can go so badly.

<<<< Spoilers >>>>>

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Sunny's abuse was so sickeningly real. Always so careful and morally superior when it comes to her engagement with fiction but that morality fails her when it comes to engagement with real people. Controlling peoples' perceptions of her as a wholesome, someone who can do no wrong, so she can then control Anita.

The detail about Sunny not brushing her teeth because she hates mint toothpaste was so gross but also such a good little character detail!! Someone who avoids feeling any kind of discomfort (engaging only with children's media, not brushing her teeth) to protect herself only to end up causing harm to herself and others (it was so gross when she spit on Anita I gasped at that part LOL).

Also really loved the artwork and UI !!! Excellent colour choices and character designs. really great work!!!

Man this really hit me in a cathartic way!!

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Thank you for making this!!

I really resonated with this game and had to like, decompress (i mean cry, but i swear it's a good thing) for a while cause of how cathartic it was. It felt like every click was intentional with such a strong attention to detail, especially the characters' expressions. I don't think I've ever felt so itchy while playing a game before (positive).

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The direct references to media felt a bit surreal, or rather so real that I felt like I tapped into unreality for a bit. And then the 3 more years of fire emblem three houses discourse snapped me back to reality dhdkdbd. Sunny repeating OLD byleth discourse to Anita was so insane to me that it made sense for her character. It's where Sunny has to find morally wrong fiction in order to police it going as far as wanting to control Anita's opinion on 7-year old discourse. Like, yikes. 

What's really unsettling is that Sunny continued to believe she was doing the right thing to the point where she pushed Anita into trying to drown herself in the lake. In her pursuit of "what's morally correct" she ended up becoming the parasite that took control of what Anita drew. Anita was no longer able to touch the "rebrand project" or express her creativity without being scrutinized by Sunny because Sunny is right even though she's done multiple wrong things in the eyes of the law. I mean, she committed theft with the usb right from the getgo. That's not lawfully correct. Sunny's sense of "righteousness" is warped such so that she will always be right and taking advantage of Anita was also right to her. (Moral of the story: Use password encryption for USBs, external drives, and sensitive folders.)

Although, I don't want to blame Anita for going through what she did but she didn't take accountability for herself. She didn't stand up for herself or make her boundaries clear which only fed Sunny's control freakiness even more. It's like Anita was the host for the parasite Sunny and instead of taking anti-parasitic medicine (being firm and drawing boundaries) or extracting the parasite (getting the hell away from Sunny, maybe throw in a restraining order), she just,,, ate more foods that the parasite really liked and thrived of off (no communicated boundaries, doing whatever Sunny said, never having a strong opinion against her, etc.) I guess in a way, Anita was comfortable (enough) with doing whatever Sunny wanted in exchange for not dealing with the grind initially because she wanted to escape struggling to survive but that backfired quickly and Anita ends up ignoring a core part of herself (the other self, I interpreted that character as her self who represents her creativity) until eventually Sunny ate away at Anita's other self (which is why she got wormed and hollowed out at the end) causing Anita to be unable to draw after Sunny died. It was like Sunny got what she wanted in the end. She managed to replace a "vital organ" as a parasite in Anita's body. 

All in all, uhhhhhhhh omg there's so much here. I kind of went off but Sunny = parasite and Anita = host, and witnessing how Sunny exerts her control over Anita by using morality in fiction as a tool of psychological control, it's such a good combo. It's such a thoughtful dive into the dangers of moral purity policing in fiction and how the social panopticon affects people's behaviors and lives. Fandom has been around for a long time and I've seen different kinds of people but omg, it's the Sunny-likes that make the experience in fandom miserable lol (im not laughing but i dont have a word that fits the "yeah this matter is serious but i gotta make it a bit lighthearted cause it sucks otherwise" feeling) 

Anyway, thank you for making this game,  seriously. It means a lot to me how you explored the matter in a visceral, raw, and unadulterated way. Thank you for capturing what it feels like to have a whole body itch. 

Oof. So damn powerful.

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So much about this hit, but a constant fear of mine has been someone finding my online accounts and then blackmailing/outing to work and family; that part almost gave me a panic attack. I wonder if it hits the same way for someone who doesn't post their red-flag content online.

I knew this would make me sick but I didn't anticipate how deep it would hit. I hated playing this and will never play it again and this is a very big compliment because I think a part of reading this is the visceral discomfort with what's unfolding on your screen. Everyone go play it now, bye

It was incredibly good! 

The whole narrative feels real in a way that is hard to describe, and the psychological portrayal of the inner monologue is eerily spot-on. The symbolism of it all really struck me as well thought-out and effective.

I appreciate the sound design choices, and to anyone looking to experience it, I'd strongly reccommend having the sound turned on otherwises you're going to miss out on cues about actions not textually described.

Talking about these topics and dynamics is not easy, let alone doing it while keeping all the nuance. It's games like this that tempt me to make a space to host some of my longer-form thoughts. I tip my metaphorical hat to you.

(contains spoilers) 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ <- worm baracade 

This VN tackles such current topics regarding fandom, art, and sex in such a human way. The dark comedy mixed with deeply personal and compelling moments of reflection from the characters made the story feel, just so fresh and personal. I really love how you weren't afraid to namedrop specific media, specifically ones that are so prevalent in spaces like the ones you're commenting on (like, sunny making anita do a "she-ra marathon" after weeks of coercing her and keeping her in an abusive household is so insanely funny and dark to me, incredible stuff)...I like that the characters felt strange and wrong and horrible and human. The art direction is lovely...I'm a big ryukishi fan, so I always love seeing photo-bashed/edited photography mixed with illustration, especially in visual novels. I like the limited use of music and reliance on sound effects. I like how much we see of Anita's face and body and emotions and we only really see what sunny "wants" us to see. I love the surreal, abstract, and dreamlike depiction of rape (kind of reminded me of Rosemary's baby, actually!) Not sure if this will make sense, but the entire art/sound direction INSTANTLY feels...musty? Like, you can tell we are in this horrible claustrophobic nightmare living situation in which sunny never brushes her teeth and probably doesnt clean either...I love the build up of realizing that sunny IS bluet, and that, maybe anita knew this all along. I love how you can tell anita is kind of denying this throughout the entire thing, and then at the end coming to terms with her grooming. And of course, the tackling of "discourse," specifically about sex, violence, and fandom culture online, especially within adults who refuse to engage with adult media, is so fascinating and empathetic. The dichotomy of an abuser with an obsession with a "correct" way to consume and produce art and how her abuse pushes her victim to create more art that she is "upset" with is just so intelligent and real. 

with every reveal, i turned away and grimaced and went "OUUGHHH" in horror of realizing what was about to occur...

(also, i just realized. anita's text message color is yellow and sunny's is blue (when we see them in the flashback). but when we meet anita, after she's already been groomed by sunny, she is a lime green, like her yellow color has been infected with sunny's blue........uwaaa...)

I kind of want to write a whole essay about this beautiful story...such well done horror...oughhh thank you for making it..!!

The concept of a Toxic Yuri VN about making an unproblematic Wholesome Yuri VN is just brilliant. As a creator I really appreciated what this game had to say about fandom purity policing and how it feels to be making art in that environment. The direct references to old discourses were so effective -- I don't think I've ever seen that in a VN before.

Spoilers ahead

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The wholesome therapyspeak Buggy Beloved scene with the heartwarming music was HYSTERICAL. I laughed so hard omg. Also the sound design was disgusting. Well done!! 

viscerally uncomfortable and i mean it as the highest compliment. far and away the best-designed game i've played for toxic yuri vn jam 2. the sound design in particular is horrifying in a way that intensifies the evocative art and prose. hot in the "cinder stuck under your fingernail" way.

it's been a year since i've basically nuked my online presence. i think i get this.

i've unfortunately had a lot of experiences similar to those of both anita and sunny and i can't say with confidence i truly learned from many of them.

this game's made think a lot about why fandoms made me feel they way they did. over the past year i've been reflecting on the social groups i've been part of. i knew there had to be people with similar experiences to mine, but i guess i just   never found them..? it's relieving to be able to play this.

it's a shame that, unless you know where to look, you won't see anyone talking about these topics. not many people are gonna like a post where they're the target, and not many people are gonna write a post when the best solution is to shut up.

i definitely need to give this game another playthrough at some point.

one sentence summary: It feels so real.

Gut-wrenching. Every moment of this is a slow twist of the knife that only gets worse and worse. A horrible suffocating prison built from wanting to protect oneself from themself. I think this work deeply understands how tortuous false progressivism is, both experiencing it and performing it. It's a soulless self defense mechanism meant to ward away an out group from oneself.

Visually this also does wonders, I love the little expressions that occasionally pop up when a character is trying to hide their disgust. The sound design is also really good, I like when VNs rely a lot of ambiance and sound effects rather than music.

One of my favs so far, thank you for making this, I feel very seen.

A very difficult read, but a damn good one. Really made me feel dread in the pit of my stomach... the way that you can just tell what Sunny's doing, and how Anita keeps turning away from truth of what's happening to her is so REAL...

Thank you so much for making this.

I'm definitely one of those 8 billion who gets it. This hit home really heavily in surprising ways. I identified with Anita very deeply. To say you nailed it is an understatement. I loved every moment and was clicking frantically at some points, to see what would happen next. The sounds and graphics really went the extra mile, especially during the uncomfortable parts. I love the subtle emotional changes on Anita and Sunny as well. Extremely expressive. 

I really enjoyed the outer UI wrappings of the stages of a mantis for each chapter. As a fellow bug appreciator, that was an extra bonus!

Thank you for making this game. It was one that I needed to play right now. <3 Take care out there and keep making awesome stuff.

The portrayal of social media age relationships, and all the boons and banes involving them, is a subject that I think a lot of media tries to center itself around, but it often feels to me like it does not do anything more than scratch the surface of "what if like and subscribe is bad", which I've found quite frustrating.

The interactions in this game feel so real it made me shiver a bit.  This is a story that has something both new and profound to say, haunting enough to stay with you but compelling enough to keep you clicking for more.

It's really something special, and I would highly recommend giving it a read!

This game made me so uncomfortable after I was done playing it i had to brush my teeth and go for a two hour long walk in complete silence at 2am its an actual 10/10

if you, a reader in the comments, are wondering if this is worth the time, even by sheer curiousity, please take this as a sign to play and digest this. i promise you will leave with a better understanding of each other.

This is going to be a lengthy comment but I hope I convey what this game made me feel well. (spoilers ahead)

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This game was not what I expected at all, I kinda had an impression/saw what I was getting in for when I saw the reviews and comments, I'm not that bothered by spoilers but man. I may not have felt as extreme emotions as people are saying they experienced playing this game, but it has given me a lot to think and reflect on.

Like many have said, they used to be and are/were Anitas and Sunnys. I feel the same, but despite what Sunny has done, even after the reveal by the end of her "true"/double identity, I couldn't help but feel bad and seen by her and Anita. A lot of times, I grow frustrated with myself now looking back on my younger years where I've been treated like Anita was by Sunny, or when I acted like a Sunny to any Anitas who knew me. I feel like the biggest "evilest" person in the world for not realizing the harm and ultimately how pointless my actions were. I've come to realize lately that I feel like I've tried to regain some sense of control/agency I felt like I never had, if I could smart enough or good enough, it would change who I am for the better. I still fear that I can never change the past and the "me" right now, that truthfully, I've always been a Sunny and I will go on to do what Sunny has done to more people, I'll never be anything more than a Sunny till the day I die. It feels hard to really accept advice to "embrace yourself and your past" cause I feel like I need to punish myself, that I can be "healed" from my true self, it feels like drowning. I'm losing my train of thought lowkey but I really saw myself in everyone. In Anita's conflict with herself (quite literally) and how powerless she is, Sunny's bizarre and black and white thinking even if it's def not to the extremes she's taken, she still reminds me of the person I am capable of becoming. I hope Anita in some way some how is able to accept herself truly, and if somehow, Sunny was able to gain some introspection about herself in another life...

That all aside, I really loved the visuals and the sound design, the lack of music and the isolated sound affects were very affective, the ui was cool too! This is strange but I remember you from when I was into TTCC, I still think back on the fanfic you did back then, it's real cool.

Execellent game, makes me think a lot, sorry for all those words or if I've overshared.